December 2007
253 posts
Stewardess… Sorry, flight attendant: “Welcome to Cancun. Ha, don’t you wish? Welcome to Albuquerque.”
Diary of a Mad Starfleet Commander →
This movie keeps getting weirder all the time. Teaser before Cloverfield.
Jimmy Fallon weds movie producer. →
He managed to laugh only three times while doing vows.
No please, be honest.
Everyone who has seen Smokin’ Aces on my recommendation on DVD has replied with a resounding, “I had to turn that shit off.” I’m not sure why I enjoyed the flick so much in the theaters, but it was a fun, loud, post-Traffic heist blast. The director, Joe Carnahan, has a history littered with projects killed in development, which may have influenced his view on a competing...
I don't mean to go on a rant here, but. . .
Tonight, an old friend relayed a story about a political discussion in which he engaged with his sister’s boyfriend. They discussed health care, foreign policy, and other such high-minded matters before the boyfriend blurted, “But, of course we can’t have a [black person] for president.” My friend’s face dropped, and he blasted the b/f for his nonsensical racism (an...
There is nothing not depressing about a bar on the south side of Chicago.
Every time I hear Hans Zimmer’s score for Pirates, I feel like he opened up GarageBand, chose “Film Score 1,” and called it a day.
When Hannah Takes the Stairs finally bowed earlier this year, a number of reviews name-dropped Andrew Katz’s Quiet City as the mumblecore film. The DVD of City ”streets” Jan. 29, doubled with Dance Party, USA. While LOL and The Puffy Chair still stand for me as the best products of mumblecore, I’m interested to see what the ballyhooed Katz has to add to the discussion.
Under Siege
While 30 Rock may have outshone The Office this season, this list did remind me how much I miss the little moments in-between the regrettable inanity (Mose, gift baskets, Michael’s car in a lake, Michael in the forest) of this season. Also, it has been far too long since I have seen new footage of Tracy Morgan’s chest.
Huckabee Sees Pakistan as Reason for Border Fence →
What the fuck. What the fuck are you talking about? How do these two things relate to each other in any way whatso-fucking-ever?
“You know, the one game show where you answer questions and they give you money.”
– My grandmother. She was thinking of “Family Feud,” the one where you do not directly answer questions for money.
[Suck] the pain away
At a gathering for a past holiday meal, someone said, “Rudy Giuliani was able to clean up New York. He could do the same as president, but I don’t want to start on that.” Much the same argument made for Bush in regards to his governing Texas while his myriad flops, miscues, and fantastical failures were ignored. Today’s article in the NY Times brings to light one of Mr....
“[W]hen you do something really stupid and terrible, like lay your head on the...”
– Devin, on his #3 worst of the year, Southland Tales. I must say I heartily disagree with his top choice as Aqua Teen is such a “love-it-or-leave-it” enterprise. I can’t imagine the program ever inspiring actual hatred on the level generated by Tales.
A couple days old, but. . .
The Brothers Coen have announced their next film will be a straight-up spaghetti Western (think more The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, less The Missing) with perhaps some social undertones as the film will include “Indians torturing people with ants.” The next film de Coens to open in theaters will be Burn Before Reading, which aside from starring Clooney, Pitt, and Malkovich was shot...
Buried in today’s Chicago Tribune, the government led by a “compassionate” conservative has again hacked away at employee benefits. Retirement looks more and more like a myth for the next generation.
The dregs of presidential coins. →
The most effective form of birth control?
A visit to Hollister. You’ll never want to produce one of those things.
Even just standing next to the panties table at Old Navy I feel like a 13-year-old skeev.
“Surrounded by women, talking my head off, and not one of them pays any attention...”
– Apparently I said this while watching old family movies a couple years ago. My dad thought it was hysterical, laughing heartily while re-mentioning it tonight.
Discussing my mother’s need for new stillettoes “for the bedroom” over Christmas breakfast not a tradition I want to continue next year. I think we’re a little too comfortable with the kids being older.
A kid at Christmas mass was licking a pew like he was at Mardi Gras.
“Look at the dinosaur with wings!”
– A dad to his child, pointing at a large stuffed dragon at Macy’s.
Somehow storing a movie digitally costs more than... →
Mr. and Mrs. Apatow debate the meaning of the word... →
She makes a good argument, even if I still disagree.
still sitting
One thing you do not want to hear in flight to Chicago: “That turn we just made is because… we don’t have enough fuel to land safely in Chicago. We’re making a quick detour to St. Louis first.”
“The Beatles loved Christmas of course.”
– Radio man on the way to the airport.
Don’t walk! Mildly jog to Walk Hard.
The backlash has begun! →
The Disney war machine notches another big hole in its belt: National Treasure 2: Book of Boring will open just shy of $60 million, followed by strong second weekends of I am Legend and Jason Lee Eats Poo.
Not only did stupidity mark a major win yesterday, it also struck a mortal blow to Judd Apatow. Walk Hard ate it, well, hard. It will open with less than $4.5 million.
Surprisingly, not the...
Whom do teachers' unions protect?
As No Child Left Behind (NCLB) faces re-authorization this coming election year, teachers’ unions have escalated efforts to kill the bill, a force Democratic candidates feel. However, as Barack Obama states in the article, the basic premise of the bill is not only sound but ethically right. A not-so-subtle racism exists in our schools, and the gap in basic reading and math skills between...
If it worked for Apatow, why not release your own...
I have a (not so) secret man-crush on Andrew Daly. Performing in Asssscat! at UCB and as Benjamin Franklin on The Office, he has proven one of the quickest and sharpest wits I have ever seen in improv, which makes me that much happier to see him in Semi-Pro, the new Will Ferrell sports movie. He plays the straight-faced assistant commentator to Will Arnett. The movie is a veritable cornucopia...
No one does haunting and beautiful like Henry... →
John August gets desperate. →
A refreshing change of tone from the usual “haughty” (maybe that will happen here one day, too).
WatchA special video post for Craig and Morgan. Merry Christmas.
